Picking your battles

In life there are some battles that are worth fighting and others that just need to be left alone. Recently I have been told over and over again that my boys rule the roost, that they play me like a fiddle, and know that if they just wait long enough they will get whatever they want. Those are really hard things to hear about yourself and merit a second look for certain. Being a parent is the single hardest thing I have ever done. Sometimes it seems like an impossible task. Most days my children are amazing and so very well behaved, but sometimes they still struggle to obey the first time I ask and not give me attitude. I guess most kids do that. I don't want to be mafia mom who never lets them do anything unless they have been perfect but I really don't want to be the mom who feels so guilty for bring divorced that she let's them get away with murder. That is what my second husband believes. He says they get everything in twos. One from us and one from their dad. Two birthdays, two Christmases, two sets of rules. I guess it us the nature of the disease called divorce and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Blending a new family is a war.  It requires finesse I am certain I don't have and energy I can't summon at times. But the end result will hopefully be happier for all of us because of each other. So I guess this is a battle I will choose to fight. I will fight to keep things on an even keel with the boys and match as much love and acceptance as I dole out discipline. I will fight to see the boys and their stepdad blend into a rhythm that ebbs and flows with respect and encouragement. And I will fight to see that my husband and I support each other fully and build a loving stable home....because some battles are just worth fighting!